Detroit (+3.5) at MIAMI (41): Lions 22, Dolphins 20.
Minnesota (+14) at PHILADELPHIA (37.5): Eagles 30, Vikings 17.
Washington (+6.5) at JACKSONVILLE (45.5): Jaguars 28, Racists 17.
San Francisco (+2.5) at ST LOUIS (40): Rams 20, 49ers 16.
Seattle (+6) at TAMPA BAY (43.5): Buccaneers 24, Seahawks 17.
New England (-7.5) at BUFFALO (45.5): Patriots 24, Bills 21.
New York Jets (+2.5) at CHICAGO (36): Bears 20, Jets 16.
Baltimore (-3) at CLEVELAND (39.5): Ravens 22, Browns 16.
Tennessee (+4) at KANSAS CITY (42.5): Chiefs 26, Titans 19.
Indianapolis (-2) at OAKLAND (47): Raiders 29, Colts 26.
Houston (-3) at DENVER (49): Texans 23, Broncos 21.
New York Giants (+3) at GREEN BAY (43): Packers 24, Giants 20.
San Diego (-8) at CINCINNATI (43.5): Chargers 26, Bengals 16.
Atlanta (-2) at NEW ORLEANS (49): Falcons 26, Saints 23.

Lock of the Week: Detroit

Trifecta: Detroit, St. Louis, Oakland

Carolina (+14) at PITTSBURGH (37.5): Two touchdowns is an awfully big number with an O/U of 37.5. Plus, don't they realize the Panthers are HOT right now?!? Steelers 23, Panthers 13.

Full picks will be posted on Saturday evening. Merry Christmas, everyone!

Kansas City (+3) at ST LOUIS (42.5): Rams 23, Chiefs 22.
Houston (+1) at TENNESSEE (47.5): Texans 23, Titans 17.
Jacksonville (+4.5) at INDIANAPOLIS (48.5): Colts 24, Jaguars 23.
Arizona (+2.5) at CAROLINA (37.5): Cardinals 17, Panthers 13.
Cleveland (PK) at CINCINNATI (40.5): Browns 19, Bengals 16.
Buffalo (+5) at MIAMI (40.5): Dolphins 21, Bills 17.
Philadelphia (+3) at NY GIANTS (47): Eagles 26, Giants 21.
Washington (+7.5) at DALLAS (44.5): Cowboys 27, Racists 14.
Detroit (+4.5) at TAMPA BAY (43): Buccaneers 23, Lions 20.
New Orleans (+2.5) at BALTIMORE (44): Ravens 19, Saints 16.
Atlanta (-6) at SEATTLE (46): Falcons 23, Seahawks 20.
New York Jets (+4.5) at PITTSBURGH (35.5): Steelers 20, Jets 17.
Denver (+7.5) at OAKLAND (41.5): Raiders 26, Broncos 16.
Green Bay (+14) at NEW ENGLAND (43.5): Patriots 23, Packers 13.
Chicago (-7.5) at MINNESOTA (33): Bears 19, Vikings 13

Lock of the Week: Philadelphia

Trifecta: Philadelphia, Dallas, Oakland

A little late, but I've been watching "The SingOff" -- Chargers 31, 49ers 14.

Oakland (+4) at JACKSONVILLE (41.5): Jaguars 26, Raiders 23.
Cincinnati (+9) at PITTSBURGH (39): Steelers 26, Bengals 13.
New England (-3) at CHICAGO (37.5): Patriots 16, Bears 10.
Cleveland (+1) at BUFFALO (39): Browns 20, Bills 14.
Green Bay (-6.5) at DETROIT (46.5): Packers 30, Lions 20.
Atlanta (-7) at CAROLINA (41): Falcons 26, Panthers 17.
Tampa Bay (-1) at WASHINGTON (40.5): Buccaneers 23, Racists 20.
St. Louis (+9.5) at NEW ORLEANS (47): Saints 27, Rams 21.
Seattle (+5) at SAN FRANCISCO (41.5): 49ers 23, Seahawks 20.
Miami (+5.5) at NY JETS (39): Jets 22, Dolphins 21.
Denver (+4.5) at ARIZONA (43.5): Broncos 24, Cardinals 17.
Kansas City (+9) at SAN DIEGO (45.5): Chargers 24, Chiefs 21.
Philadelphia (-3) at DALLAS (51): Eagles 23, Cowboys 21.
Baltimore (-3) at HOUSTON (46): Ravens 24, Texans 20.
NY Giants (NL) at MINNESOTA (NA): Giants 23, Vikings 20.

Lock of the Week: Kansas City
Trifecta: KC, Cleveland, Denver

Buffalo (+5) at MINNESOTA (43.5): Anyone else think the Vikings might win out? Vikings 24, Bills 20.
Cleveland (+5) at MIAMI (43.5): The Dolphins suck at home, and the Browns' running game will make this Peyton's Place. Browns 23, Dolphins 20.
Jacksonville (+3) at TENNESSEE (44): Is this the week Chris Johnson stops playing like Arte Johnson? Nope. Jaguars 22, Titans 16.
Denver (+8) at KANSAS CITY (48.5): The Chiefs just keep teasing us and our 100-1 $10 ticket. This week should be easy, though. Chiefs 31, Broncos 17.
Washington (+7) at NY GIANTS (43): Giants 27, Racists 17.
Chicago (+4.5) at DETROIT (43.5): Is Eric Hipple starting this week? Bears 24, Lions 16.
San Francisco (+8) at GREEN BAY (41): Packers 27, 49ers 14.
New Orleans (-6.5) at CINCINNATI (45): Saints 26, Bengals 17.
Atlanta (-3) at TAMPA BAY (43.5): Falcons 23, Buccaneers 19.
Oakland (+13) at SAN DIEGO (44.5): Chargers 30, Raiders 20.
Carolina (+4.5) at SEATTLE (40): Seahawks 23, Panthers 17.
Dallas (+5) at INDIANAPOLIS (47.5): This game scares the hell out of us. It's like thinking about Jerry Jones's face first thing in the morning. Colts 24, Cowboys 21.
St. Louis (-3.5) at ARIZONA (44): This game won't be very good, but Derek Anderson's postgame chat might be worth watching. Rams 26, Cardinals 16.
Pittsburgh (+3) at BALTIMORE (39): If somehow Ray Lewis and Ben Roethlisberger could end one another's careers on the same play, this would be the best game ever. Ravens 21, Steelers 17.
NY Jets (+3.5) at NEW ENGLAND (45): Tom Brady -- hair loss? Maybe. Loss to the Jets. No. Patriots 24, Jets 20.

Lock of the Week: Cleveland

Trifecta: Cleveland, Green Bay, Chicago

Welcome to Week 13 of the 2010 edition of The Hoser's NFL Picks, where we're drifting back to Earth a little.

We were 7-8 against the spread and 11-4 straight up last week. If that looks a little strange, it's because at the time we put up our picks, there was no line on the Oakland/Miami game, and we never came back to correct that. So, yeah. We did have Chicago as our Lock of the Week (and even picked them straight up) over the Eagles. No kidding -- there was a dog barking outside The Hoser's office most of that night.

Awesome.

The rest of the picks will go up on Saturday -- this is just the Thursday Night Teaser. See you then!

Houston (+8) at PHILADELPHIA (52): It takes a mighty defense like Chicago to slow Michael Vick. The Texans are close -- they have a mighty shitty defense. Eagles 30, Texans 20.