Monday, March 31, 2008

I stopped by my bank (TD Canada Trust) on my way home this evening to make a deposit. I have a business account, and when I entered, there was one person in front of me aside from the woman at the window.

Ten minutes later, there were two more people behind me still waiting for the woman to finish up. In addition, there was a grand total of two tellers at the personal windows -- and 16 people waiting in line.

There are two distinct factors at work here:

1) TD needs to put more people on, simple as that. I place no blame whatsoever at the feet of the employees. They worked quickly and were friendly, despite the understandably unfriendly attitudes of the customers who had been waiting for 10-15 minutes.

2) TD needs to take up my idea from an earlier post and start charging people for the amount of time it takes them to do their banking. That one woman -- who appeared to be cashing in several years' worth of change and depositing it in multiple accounts -- took up minutes of not only the teller's time, but also all of us standing there behind her.

Get your house in order before you come to the bank, people -- it's not just your time. And if you don't, you'll pay for it.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Now you tell me why you don't believe in the death penalty.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

According to this morning's Toronto Star, Leafs head coach Paul Maurice plans to continue running goalie Vesa Toskala in the ground. Maurice says Toskala's play has earned him the starts and that right now, the Iron Horse will be "playing important games right till the end."

First off, Maurice should be tipped off by someone that the Leafs stopped playing important games when they lost two in a row to the Devils last week. It's over, and to not accept that is to waste the opportunity to get Andrew Raycroft some work.

Why work Raycroft? Well, suppose Raycroft actually shows something down the stretch, a little spark of his former self. Now, instead of having to buy out his contract, perhaps you can get something for him -- not much, to be sure, but even a sixth-round pick would be better than the buyout.

And if Raycroft doesn't play well, does it matter? It just means the Leafs get a better draft position for next season.

As for Toskala, what good does it do Toronto to continue to run him out? Will Vesa be able to win them every game? Not with this roster -- that's been painfully clear all season. Playing him constantly could get him injured, and wouldn't that be terrific -- have your new No. 1 tear a knee ligament and have to go through an offseason of rehabilitation?

Do the right thing, Paul -- get Razor in the pipes.

I spent much of yesterday being beaten about the face and ears by CNN with the news of New York governor Eliot Spitzer's alleged involvement in a prostitution ring. Seriously, it was like the guy had stolen an election or something.

My wife seemed most shocked that Spitzer had gone to the trouble of having his favourite hooker brought in to Washington, D.C., from New York City. I explained it for her, though.

I mean, have you ever seen the prostitutes in the nation's capital? They make Aileen Wournos look like Charlize Theron. I worked in Washington for a few weeks, and I had all my hookers flown in from Atlanta.

There's no way Spitzer will ever get his political career back on track, either. I could never trust him after his choice of alias at The Mayflower Hotel. I mean, I don't love George Fox or anything, but how could any male New York voter put his faith in Spitzer when he passed up the chance to use Heywood Jablowme, Dick Fitzwell or Wolf Blitzer is beyond me.

Monday, March 10, 2008

I finally became a permanent resident of Canada last week. Oddly enough, after all the incorrect information, misdirection and flat-out incompetence we received, the final step was handled beautifully.

We were given a date to appear at Immigration. We showed up about a half-hour ahead of our appointment and had to sit on the floor. I wasn't sure what to expect -- waterboarding? The secret Canadian handshake?

Instead, my wife and I were called to a small window (pretty much the same as you'd pay your hydro bill), asked a couple of questions and given congratulations. The process took all of 10 minutes, and then we were directed to another window to register for my Social Insurance number. The woman there had some real difficulties in spelling my mother's maiden name, but then, so does everyone else.

I don't feel any differently now that I'm all legal, but I guess I'll have to continue shedding my American ways.

I've already called the local smelter about melting down my hand guns.